Pardon me as I go on a stream of consciousness ramble here...
It would appear that overnight, I lost one of my followers. Don't know why... I can only assume that the rainbow colored scarf was just too much for them... oh well... If they're that touchy they don't need to be hanging around me anyway... I have strange fits of obnoxiousness and the thin skinned don't bear up well.
I've also been thinking about my depression fits. I've mentioned before that I grew up in a house with an unmedicated bi-polar sibling. I am probably a little more aware of moods and such than most... a few years ago I had it checked out, and, fortunately, I had a Dr. that didn't immediately start prescribing drugs. She ran the tests and came back with the conclusion that yes, I was probably a little depressive, but it didn't seem serious enough to resort to pharmacueticals. This is a good thing, as I've had experience with some of them and I don't always react well to them. She recommended a healthy diet, and learning what would trigger the depressions and avoiding that if possible or learning to deal with it in a different way. She even recommended a few books that might help. And they did.
That's why I avoid holiday parties. Not neccesarily all of them, in particular family centered ones where there's likely to be self-centered teenagers with a high sense of the dramatic. Which, let's face it, is most teenagers. And no, they probably won't throw a full bipolar fit... but things are likely to happen that will trigger a bad chain reaction in my head.
But, I've done a lot of reading and research on Depression. And I'm probably a bit of a sucker for any book that claims it will help me deal with it. Some are excellent. Some are pure tripe. I've found the ones that don't neccesarily talk about depression are often much more helpful. There was a book called "Embracing the Shadow" written by a Jungian psychologist (can't think of the author name at the moment) that was amazingly helpful.
I think I've also mentioned on the blog that I go to a Non-Denominational Church. Our members have had backgrounds in about every belief system out there. And that's good. We are not a 'blind faith' group. We don't neccesarily believe everything that a pastor says to us, nor do we follow like sheep off the cliff. We are expected to think and to discuss. The only requirement is that we treat each others attitudes with respect.
I am lucky that I have the kind of mind that doesn't dismiss things out of hand. When given a new idea, I tend to pick it up, turn it over, look at it from all sides... eventually I'll probably put it down and either abandon it or come back when it's needed. I have consequently learned things that I never would have learned before. What I've always found interesting though is how different sources, different backgrounds and different beliefs often have so much in common. It's that universal stuff that I find so fascinating.
For instance... I was given a copy of 'Eat Pray Love' recently. I had seen the movie, and it was ok... but the book is much better. It's a deeply spiritual book, in a down to earth and often humorous way... heavy on Buddism.
I was also given a copy of "The Secret." The best way to describe it is all of those Power of Positive Thinking type books smashed together, mixed up and condensed.
Another member of the church sent me a link to a website about creativity in general. The web site had a story in it... about a CIA study. It would appear that the CIA put a bunch of people in chairs and made them watch cartoons and comedians and such while they monitored their physical reactions. Anyone who has ever been amused knows that it affects you physically... it releases endorphins and all sorts of brain chemicals... nothing too surprising there. Next, the researchers took a group, and made them hold an ink pen between their teeth. This forces your cheeks up into an unnatural smile or grin... and according to the monitors... the physiological changes from sitting there with their faces forced into a smile were exactly the same as the people who were highly amused. (I should note that the site didn't give me any reference to the actual CIA study, so I can't confirm the source. I hate that about the web.)
Then I remembered in 'Eat Pray Love' that one of her gurus had recommended that she sit and meditate while smiling for about 15 minutes a day, to ensure happiness and health.
And in 'The Secret' they recommended watching comedies and listening to music that made you happy, because happiness attracts more happiness.
I find these areas of common ground in these vastly different contexts fascinating.
I have come to a certain understanding about some things.
People always see what they want to see. A devoutly religious person will see evidence of the divine in everything. A committed athiest will see the lack of the divine in everything. Most of the population are somewhere in the middle.
That sort of thing.
I think I'm about done for the day. I should get on with what needs to be done. Sorry about the rambling nature of the post... I'm afraid I didn't write in my journal this morning and you got one of my journal entries here... LOL
It would appear that overnight, I lost one of my followers. Don't know why... I can only assume that the rainbow colored scarf was just too much for them... oh well... If they're that touchy they don't need to be hanging around me anyway... I have strange fits of obnoxiousness and the thin skinned don't bear up well.
I've also been thinking about my depression fits. I've mentioned before that I grew up in a house with an unmedicated bi-polar sibling. I am probably a little more aware of moods and such than most... a few years ago I had it checked out, and, fortunately, I had a Dr. that didn't immediately start prescribing drugs. She ran the tests and came back with the conclusion that yes, I was probably a little depressive, but it didn't seem serious enough to resort to pharmacueticals. This is a good thing, as I've had experience with some of them and I don't always react well to them. She recommended a healthy diet, and learning what would trigger the depressions and avoiding that if possible or learning to deal with it in a different way. She even recommended a few books that might help. And they did.
That's why I avoid holiday parties. Not neccesarily all of them, in particular family centered ones where there's likely to be self-centered teenagers with a high sense of the dramatic. Which, let's face it, is most teenagers. And no, they probably won't throw a full bipolar fit... but things are likely to happen that will trigger a bad chain reaction in my head.
But, I've done a lot of reading and research on Depression. And I'm probably a bit of a sucker for any book that claims it will help me deal with it. Some are excellent. Some are pure tripe. I've found the ones that don't neccesarily talk about depression are often much more helpful. There was a book called "Embracing the Shadow" written by a Jungian psychologist (can't think of the author name at the moment) that was amazingly helpful.
I think I've also mentioned on the blog that I go to a Non-Denominational Church. Our members have had backgrounds in about every belief system out there. And that's good. We are not a 'blind faith' group. We don't neccesarily believe everything that a pastor says to us, nor do we follow like sheep off the cliff. We are expected to think and to discuss. The only requirement is that we treat each others attitudes with respect.
I am lucky that I have the kind of mind that doesn't dismiss things out of hand. When given a new idea, I tend to pick it up, turn it over, look at it from all sides... eventually I'll probably put it down and either abandon it or come back when it's needed. I have consequently learned things that I never would have learned before. What I've always found interesting though is how different sources, different backgrounds and different beliefs often have so much in common. It's that universal stuff that I find so fascinating.
For instance... I was given a copy of 'Eat Pray Love' recently. I had seen the movie, and it was ok... but the book is much better. It's a deeply spiritual book, in a down to earth and often humorous way... heavy on Buddism.
I was also given a copy of "The Secret." The best way to describe it is all of those Power of Positive Thinking type books smashed together, mixed up and condensed.
Another member of the church sent me a link to a website about creativity in general. The web site had a story in it... about a CIA study. It would appear that the CIA put a bunch of people in chairs and made them watch cartoons and comedians and such while they monitored their physical reactions. Anyone who has ever been amused knows that it affects you physically... it releases endorphins and all sorts of brain chemicals... nothing too surprising there. Next, the researchers took a group, and made them hold an ink pen between their teeth. This forces your cheeks up into an unnatural smile or grin... and according to the monitors... the physiological changes from sitting there with their faces forced into a smile were exactly the same as the people who were highly amused. (I should note that the site didn't give me any reference to the actual CIA study, so I can't confirm the source. I hate that about the web.)
Then I remembered in 'Eat Pray Love' that one of her gurus had recommended that she sit and meditate while smiling for about 15 minutes a day, to ensure happiness and health.
And in 'The Secret' they recommended watching comedies and listening to music that made you happy, because happiness attracts more happiness.
I find these areas of common ground in these vastly different contexts fascinating.
I have come to a certain understanding about some things.
People always see what they want to see. A devoutly religious person will see evidence of the divine in everything. A committed athiest will see the lack of the divine in everything. Most of the population are somewhere in the middle.
That sort of thing.
I think I'm about done for the day. I should get on with what needs to be done. Sorry about the rambling nature of the post... I'm afraid I didn't write in my journal this morning and you got one of my journal entries here... LOL
There's also some very nice native scrub oak, but not terribly old, they don't have the 4 foot wide trunks and twisted branches of the real old timers, some good pecan trees... small nuts on them though so probably wild ones rather than the larger fruited orchard varieties, and a few live oaks scattered around, but these were between 25 and 50 years old, practically adolescent for a live oak.
and the furry one (which hasn't opened all the way yet...)
So, anyway, I kept walking around and noticing things... It's really amazing what's all around you all the time, but you don't see because you just don't look. Now, the lawn of the park itself is really about one of my favorite kind of lawns around... It's part bermuda grass, mixed with St. Augustine grass, mixed with weeds. I like weeds. They're interesting. I know, it's absolutely un-American, but the sight of a dandylion in my yard doesn't give me fits. So, there I am, and there was a plastic shopping bag blowing by, so I picked it up, then I started picking up little pieces of litter, which are inevitable in about any park and which I always pick up. Grandma again I guess, but I always feel compelled to make sure that everyplace is a little bit better when I leave then when I got there. I'm not a nut about it, but if more people were like that, imagine how much better the world would be? 
Now, I used to be an absolute demon 4-leaf clover hunter. I used to have about 30 of them pressed in the family bible... I used some of them on the matte around a pic of my niece once, and I don't know what happened to the rest, but this is the first one I've found in probably 20 years. The problem is that I'm in Texas... this really isn't clover country. There are a few native varieties, but they're clumpy, rather rank plants, white clover really requires less heat and more winter than we get here... but when I was a kid in the midwest, people used to sow white or pink clover in their yards. The clover would catch nitrogen in the air, feed it into the soil and help keep the lawns nice and green. Of course, now that everybody seems to be trying to grow a golfing green, anything not grass is forbidden, but when I was a kid clover in the lawns made a nice soft and green lawn to run barefoot through... unless the clover was blooming and you stepped on a bee. 
