Bleck...

Have you ever had one of those experiences that made you wanna just throw up your hands and say "Screw it!"

Of course you have.  Unless you've lived a Utopian life... that's the way life is. 

What's prompted this in me is...  I had a 'date.'

This particular "date" is going down on my list of TOP TEN SOCIAL DISASTERS. 

I'm not gonna bore you with the details.  1)  Retelling it would involve reliving it in my mind and... no, just no... and 2)  I usually write my disasters in a way that gets my point across while providing some sort of amusement for the readers and I just can't think of any way to do that with this. 

Still, I was aware that I haven't posted in a bit so I had to do something...

Hope everyone out there is having a better day than me.  And that shouldn't be too difficult...

It would appear that yesterday I had 160 pageviews on Blogger. 

Interesting.  Don't know what the hell they found so fascinating, but there they are.  If they come back... howdy.  Nice to see you.  Whoever you are...

Anyway... coming out of over a week of electricity was interesting.  I habitually, and automatically, wake up at about 5 AM local time.  After merely a week of no electricity, I find myself stumbling around the house NOT turning on a light.  Finally, it occurs to me that I do have electricity, and I flip the switch... but damn, it's strange how quickly that happened. 

Of course, there was some stuff in the fridge that has to go... but I don't really keep that much in the house.  I'm a single guy, who works 8 to 12 hours a day.  Not much of what I actually would call 'cooking' goes on here.  I try to eat as healthy as possible... but after 12 hours on a road I'm hard pressed to find the energy to open a can. 

What's in the house is salad fixins, milk, half & half for my coffee and any piece of meat I can slap in a pan and fry.  The meat I usually get on the way home... I don't keep a lot here unless there is a big sale and some of it can go in the freezer.  The problem with that is that I have to remember to defrost it. 

I don't keep bread around because I don't eat it.  Seriously, a loaf of bread will go green before I've eaten 1/4 of it.  Plus... I've delivered to the big bakeries in the area.  And I know people who worked for them.  All that hype about buying day old bread?  Nonsense.  Your average loaf of white bread is a few days old before it ever hit the store to begin with.  Stuff is so full of preservatives it's actually kinda surprising that it CAN grow mold.  I'm afraid any carbs I eat are confined to the vegetable ones rather than the grain ones.  Potatoes cooked in the microwave are about it.  Although, I will confess to occasional strange cravings for Fritos corn chips.  Love the things... but I think it's the salt as much as anything else. 

Of course... now we're hearing all the hype about Gluten free foods.  I don't worry about it too much... like I said... I don't eat much grain anyway.  I always gravatated to real veggies and meat.  Guess it was from growing up around my Grandmother and her half acre vegetable garden.  She fed nine kids from that garden, and there were always quite a few hungry grandkids around when I was growing up...

Don't eat much in the egg department either.  If I buy them, I tend to buy a half dozen, and they last a couple of weeks.  This I attribute to growing up with my Grandmother again... an egg fresh from the hen house is much, much better than an egg from a grocery store.  The color is better, and it acts different when you put it in the pan. 

And one of these days... I'm actually going to talk about plants.  You'll die of surprise. 

I'm back... you lucky dogs you...

so... I guess I should explain about that last post... especially coming so soon after one of my "depression" posts.  No... the big D hasn't raised it's ugly head again, this was the blasted truck... I had a break down, and I had to buy a mondo expensive part for it. 

Unfortunately, it came down to this... I could buy the part for the truck to keep working and make more money... or I could pay the overdue electric bill.  I figured the part was more expensive and far more important.  The Electric Company had other ideas entirely.  I was cut off...

So, I know that sounds hideous... but I have that sort of background... out came the old kerosine lamps.  Actually, they were already out, but they were filled and actually used for a change, and out of the cedar chest came the old wool quilts. 

All I really had to go out of my way for was cooking food... Sterno is actually pretty affordable. 

Speaking of affordable... If you go to the hobby stores in the area to find lamp oil... a half gallon costs about 15 bucks.  If you go to the Wal-mart neighborhood market... it costs 7.95... or the Wal-mart superstore sells it for 5.95.  I figured up how long that would last me, and it comes down to this... those lamps are cheaper to run than a light bulb. 

True... they're not as bright, but they are brighter than a candle, and as long as your not reading, you're fine.  And the light is warmer... nice and golden toned... really if you're looking into saving a few bucks... look into them.  Provided, of course, you can find the oil at a reasonable price... and you don't have rambunctious children and animals that are prone to ramming into furniture and tipping them over.

Regardless, the electricity is back on... and I've learned a few new non-electric tricks to take forward into the future. 

Ugh... life has been challenging lately.   I won't bore you with the details... but I'm posting from a friends house and I may be on or off line for the next few days. 

Just once, I really really wish for a drama free week... LOL

This blogger thing is starting to hack me off. 

First... thank you all for your lovely comments on my last post... unfortunately... Blogger isn't allowing me to comment on my own posts. 

GRRRRRR

Just some thoughts...

Pardon me as I go on a stream of consciousness ramble here...

It would appear that overnight, I lost one of my followers.  Don't know why... I can only assume that the rainbow colored scarf was just too much for them... oh well... If they're that touchy they don't need to be hanging around me anyway... I have strange fits of obnoxiousness and the thin skinned don't bear up well.

I've also been thinking about my depression fits.  I've mentioned before that I grew up in a house with an unmedicated bi-polar sibling.  I am probably a little more aware of moods and such than most... a few years ago I had it checked out, and, fortunately, I had a Dr. that didn't immediately start prescribing drugs.  She ran the tests and came back with the conclusion that yes, I was probably a little depressive, but it didn't seem serious enough to resort to pharmacueticals.  This is a good thing, as I've had experience with some of them and I don't always react well to them.  She recommended a healthy diet, and learning what would trigger the depressions and avoiding that if possible or learning to deal with it in a different way.  She even recommended a few books that might help.  And they did. 

That's why I avoid holiday parties.  Not neccesarily all of them, in particular  family centered ones where there's likely to be self-centered teenagers with a high sense of the dramatic.  Which, let's face it, is most teenagers.  And no, they probably won't throw a full bipolar fit... but things are likely to happen that will trigger a bad chain reaction in my head. 

But, I've done a lot of reading and research on Depression.  And I'm probably a bit of a sucker for any book that claims it will help me deal with it.  Some are excellent.  Some are pure tripe.  I've found the ones that don't neccesarily talk about depression are often much more helpful.  There was a book called "Embracing the Shadow" written by a Jungian psychologist (can't think of the author name at the moment)  that was amazingly helpful. 

I think I've also mentioned on the blog that I go to a Non-Denominational Church.  Our members have had backgrounds in about every belief system out there.  And that's good.  We are not a 'blind faith' group.  We don't neccesarily believe everything that a pastor says to us, nor do we follow like sheep off the cliff.  We are expected to think and to discuss.  The only requirement is that we treat each others attitudes with respect. 

I am lucky that I have the kind of mind that doesn't dismiss things out of hand.  When given a new idea, I tend to pick it up, turn it over, look at it from all sides... eventually I'll probably put it down and either abandon it or come back when it's needed.  I have consequently learned things that I never would have learned before.  What I've always found interesting though is how different sources, different backgrounds and different beliefs often have so much in common.  It's that universal stuff that I find so fascinating. 

For instance... I was given a copy of 'Eat Pray Love' recently.  I had seen the movie, and it was ok... but the book is much better.  It's a deeply spiritual book, in a down to earth and often humorous way... heavy on Buddism. 

I was also given a copy of "The Secret."  The best way to describe it is all of those Power of Positive Thinking type books smashed together, mixed up and condensed. 

Another member of the church sent me a link to a website about creativity in general.  The web site had a story in it... about a CIA study.  It would appear that the CIA put a bunch of people in chairs and made them watch cartoons and comedians and such while they monitored their physical reactions.  Anyone who has ever been amused knows that it affects you physically... it releases endorphins and all sorts of brain chemicals... nothing too surprising there.  Next, the researchers took a group, and made them hold an ink pen between their teeth.  This forces your cheeks up into an unnatural smile or grin... and according to the monitors... the physiological changes from sitting there with their faces forced into a smile were exactly the same as the people who were highly amused.  (I should note that the site didn't give me any reference to the actual CIA study, so I can't confirm the source.  I hate that about the web.) 

Then I remembered in 'Eat Pray Love' that one of her gurus had recommended that she sit and meditate while smiling for about 15 minutes a day, to ensure happiness and health. 

And in 'The Secret' they recommended watching comedies and listening to music that made you happy, because happiness attracts more happiness. 

I find these areas of common ground in these vastly different contexts fascinating. 

I have come to a certain understanding about some things. 

People always see what they want to see.  A devoutly religious person will see evidence of the divine in everything.  A committed  athiest will see the lack of the divine in everything.   Most of the population are somewhere  in the middle. 

That sort of thing. 

I think I'm about done for the day.  I should get on with what needs to be done.  Sorry about the rambling nature of the post... I'm afraid I didn't write in my journal this morning and you got one of my journal entries here... LOL

Well, I haven't been here in a while, have I?  

Here's the thing... I got through the holiday season just fine.  However, for the first time in my life, I had Post-Holiday depression.  Ugh... just can't seem to get away from that big old D-thing, can I...

fine now. 

Here's my latest project... I think I mentioned before how I was making scarves for all the church guys.  Did that... they liked them, everything is cool... but they were all plain ole 1 color scarves.  Then I got a bug up my nose and I wanted to make something colorful... and with the big D looming, I crawled out of the house and bought some yarn. 

I made a big ole rainbow scarf. 

Pardon the bad cell phone  pics...

now... when you buy six skeins of yarn to make one scarf.. you end up having enough yarn to make six scarves.  So I made them and I put them in the vehicle to drop off at the flea market next time I was in... and in the meantime, I wore one out.  And promptly sold half of them out of the truck when I walked into the bar wearing it. 
The thing is... they're really nice scarves.  A full six foot long, because a short scarf is completely and totally useless as far as I'm concerned, and nice and fluffy.  And evidently worth about 20 bucks each... provided the customer base has had a couple of 'refreshing beverages'

So, I've been crocheting away, and I've given myself a wee case of carpel tunnel in the process, but that'll pass, and now somebody who works at the Dallas Apparel Mart, who represents 5 fashion designers, wants to sell them at his market store and if I actually go into production I have a strange feeling I'm going to be haunting nursing homes trying to get little old ladies to supplement their income with crochet projects... Lord have mercy on us all...